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change yourself

Does your partner talk too much (or too little)?
Written on March 17th.

Have you ever thought women talk more than men? If so, you aren’t alone. This well-established myth was mainstreamed in 2006 when the book, “The Female Brain,” claimed women speak an average of 20,000 daily words, while men only speak 7,000. A critique later showed, however, the author was only citing the opinion of another self-help author, and it had no factual basis.

Couple Talking

The truth is: on average, women and men talk nearly the same. One of the few scientific studies on the subject came out of the University of Arizona in 2007, showing women talk an average of 16,215 words per day versus 15,669 for men, a difference not statistically significant. The most interesting finding from the study showed that the difference between individuals can be as much as 45,000 words per day! … Read More.

What to do when you wish your partner would change
Written on February 18th.

Again and again, in our counseling practice, couples come to us who want their partner to change: to be healthier, more productive, more social and outgoing, more financially savvy, less demanding, sexier, more spiritual, and so on. If you are really honest with yourself, there are probably some ways you too wish your partner would change to fit your ideal image of a mate.

Being in a relationship is a very unique part of our lives. Here is this other human being who has a tremendous impact on us, and yet we don’t have control over their thoughts, feelings, actions, or appearance. When you wish your partner was different, it’s easy to feel frustrated, disappointed, discouraged, out of control, and dissatisfied. You’ve probably had moments dreaming of someone else and how much easier or more fulfilling (you think) it would be. … Read More.

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