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My dear dad, whose own father passed away suddenly in his sleep when he was just 11 years old, raised us with the notion “never go to bed upset with each other.” This is also the advice he gave Bret when he came to ask my dad for his blessing on our marriage. It has become advice we truly live by, and this old adage, in addition to its obvious benefits, has even more tremendous wisdom in it.

Not only do we psychologically most remember the beginnings and endings of things (rather than the middle), our subconscious is incredibly vulnerable to being programmed right before we fall asleep. In fact, about 15 minutes before falling asleep, our mind and body begin to calm down, our muscles let go, our breathing becomes more at ease, our heartbeats start to slow down, and our whole system goes into a deeper state of relaxation. At this point, the brain produces alpha waves. According to EEG studies, in this 15-minute window between wakefulness and sleep, our subconscious mind is exceptionally open to receive messages.

This doesn’t mean you have to solve every problem before bed. It just means that you want to be especially mindful of planting the seeds that you want to grow — like kindness, peacefulness, happiness, and love. When you wake up the next day, you’ll be very glad that you did!

Sweet dreams of every kind to you!

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