Ever feel like you and your beloved want different things or are headed in opposite directions? If so, know that your uniqueness from one another does not mean you are inherently incompatible. In fact, differences can be beautiful and add balance and variety to your relationship (something that probably attracted you at the very beginning).
One essential key to ensure your different interests don’t take you away from each other is to be genuinely interested in whatever your beloved is excited about.
It’s so important not to discount one another’s interests and desires when they are different from your own. Instead, get curious about them, learn from your beloved, ask him or her open-ended questions, and get excited with and for your beloved about whatever is important to him or her.
Even if you aren’t involved in the same things, simply being interested in and connected to each other’s interests can make a huge difference!
How We Do This Little Thing
We are really intentional about learning more about each other’s passions, not by always doing them together, but by asking each other questions about them, learning enough to engage one another, doing thoughtful things that show our support, and getting excited right alongside one another — because it lights us up to see each other engaged in life!
For example, last weekend, I (Christine) was so fortunate to lead a retreat I developed and facilitated called The Joy Potential Experience (see the photo collage above!). Bret was not involved in this retreat in any way but decided to cancel his prior weekend plans to join us — just to stay connected to something so very dear to my heart. It meant the world to have him there and to share this experience together.
How You Can Put the Little Thing Into Practice in Your Own Life
Does this mean we have to do everything together? No way! In fact, independence and having different interests is healthy and can help you find each other interesting for a lifetime.
However, when there is something your beloved is really excited about, even when it’s something you find boring, this will show your love and support and communicate to your beloved how interested you are in them.
Whether it’s a project at work they are pumped up about, a book they’re reading, a hobby they love, or some quirky interest you’ve never fully understood, try this out…
– ask your beloved some genuinely curious questions about it
– join alongside your beloved doing it
– do some research on your own to learn more about it
– do something sweet to show your support of your beloved’s interest (example: buying some paintbrushes for your beloved who has taken up a watercoloring class)