Learning how to have a conversation that leaves both people feeling seen, heard, and more fully understood is something nearly everyone longs for in their relationships…
…and something nearly everyone can learn to do.
We’re excited to share 5 key things to do before you share your own perspective in a conversation.
When you do these, not only is your partner more likely to feel truly heard and understood, they also become exponentially more available to hear and understand YOU.
5 Keys for BEFORE You Respond to Your Partner
- Get out of your head and into their world.
Instead of planning your response, focus first on imagining what it’s like to be them. Empathy before feedback, almost always.
- Listen to understand, not to defend.
Instead of jumping in to explain yourself, correct the details, or prove your point, focus first on truly understanding their experience.
- Reflect back what you heard.
Before sharing your perspective, assure them you’ve heard theirs.
Try reflecting back what you heard: “It sounds like you’re feeling…”
This helps your partner know you really get them before you ask them to really get you.
- Appreciate before you make a request or offer feedback.
Rather than jumping right into what isn’t working or what you wish were different, first acknowledge what you appreciate or what they’re already doing well.
- Stay curious and connected.
Rather than jumping in to challenge, criticize, assume, analyze, or judge, ask genuine, open-hearted questions like: “Can you tell me more?”
May this offer a little loving checklist before you share your perspective next.
Ask yourself:
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- Have I stepped into their world and offered empathy?
- Have I listened non-defensively to understand?
- Have I reflected back what I heard?
- Have I shared appreciation first?
- Have I stayed curious and connected?
- Have I stepped into their world and offered empathy?
These things first. Your perspective next.
If you would like to have more productive, connecting conversations, ones in which you actually feel seen, heard, and understood, we’re here to help make it 10x easier and more effective!
You are always warmly welcome to reach us at 812-223-7186 M-F or schedule a FREE 20-minute consultation to learn more about our private sessions, available anywhere in the world.
Sending you so much love and support always,
